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Why Perfectionism Could Be Holding You Back (And How to Break Free)

Jonathan Riley

Perfectionism sounds like a good thing on the surface. We think striving for perfection will push us to excel, make fewer mistakes, and gain respect. But what if I told you that perfectionism often holds us back rather than propelling us forward? It creates a cycle of stress, self-doubt, and procrastination that can derail even the most ambitious goals. If we don’t recognize how it operates, perfectionism can slowly chip away at our confidence and productivity.

Research shows the darker side of perfectionism. A study published in Psychological Bulletin found that perfectionism is on the rise, particularly among younger generations, and it’s linked to anxiety, depression, and burnout. Perfectionists tend to set unrealistically high standards for themselves, and when they fall short, the self-criticism can be brutal. This inner pressure to be flawless doesn’t drive success—it creates paralysis. Instead of doing the best we can, we often avoid taking action altogether out of fear of failing.

A clear example of how perfectionism holds us back can be seen in Steve Jobs’ earlier years at Apple. Jobs was a known perfectionist, and while this quality helped shape some iconic products, it also caused unnecessary delays and strained relationships. For instance, his insistence on creating the “perfect” computer with the Lisa project led to skyrocketing costs and a product that ultimately flopped. Jobs eventually learned to balance high standards with practicality, but his early struggles are a cautionary tale about how perfectionism can derail even the most talented leaders.

One of the biggest traps of perfectionism is procrastination. Many of us put off starting a project because we’re waiting for the “perfect” time, tools, or plan. But perfectionism convinces us that nothing is ever good enough, so we keep delaying, revising, or overthinking. Have you ever spent hours fine-tuning something that was already good just to avoid the fear of judgment? That’s perfectionism at work. Instead of moving forward, we stay stuck.

Another way perfectionism limits us is by narrowing our perspective. When we’re focused on avoiding mistakes, we become risk-averse and less willing to try new things. Creativity suffers because perfectionism tells us every idea must be fully formed before it’s shared. Leaders and entrepreneurs, in particular, can fall into this trap. Fear of failure can prevent bold decisions or stop us from launching a product until it’s flawless—which often means missing opportunities.

So how do we break free from perfectionism and reclaim our potential? It starts with challenging the underlying beliefs that drive it. Perfectionism is often rooted in fear—fear of failure, criticism, or not being good enough. Asking ourselves questions like, “What’s the worst that could happen if this isn’t perfect?” can help us put things into perspective. Most of the time, the worst-case scenario isn’t as bad as we imagine. Letting go of the need for perfection allows us to focus on progress instead.

One way to reframe our mindset is by adopting a “good enough” approach. This doesn’t mean settling for mediocrity—it means recognizing that something doesn’t have to be flawless to have value. Jeff Bezos, founder of Amazon, is a great example. He famously said, “If you double the number of experiments you do per year, you’re going to double your inventiveness.” Bezos embraced failure and imperfection as part of the process, which helped Amazon become the global giant it is today.

Practicing self-compassion is another critical step. Perfectionism thrives on self-criticism, but we can choose to be kinder to ourselves. Instead of berating ourselves for not meeting impossible standards, we can acknowledge our efforts and focus on what we’ve learned. Studies show that self-compassion improves resilience and motivation, making it a powerful antidote to perfectionism.

We also need to embrace imperfection as a natural part of growth. Every mistake is an opportunity to learn. Thomas Edison reportedly said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” His willingness to fail and learn from it ultimately led to the invention of the light bulb. Edison’s story reminds us that progress, not perfection, leads to breakthroughs.

To break free from perfectionism, we can also set realistic goals. Instead of aiming for flawless execution, let’s focus on small, actionable steps. Celebrating progress, no matter how small, builds momentum and confidence. It’s okay to revise and improve over time—what matters is getting started and staying consistent.

If we continue to let perfectionism dictate our choices, the consequences can be severe. It can lead to chronic stress, missed opportunities, and damaged relationships. It’s not about lowering our standards; it’s about shifting our mindset to prioritize growth over perfection. By letting go of the fear of imperfection, we free ourselves to take risks, embrace creativity, and reach our true potential. Progress is always better than perfection, and the sooner we start, the farther we’ll go.

Struggling with stress? Your mental health matters. Take the first step toward becoming the best version of yourself—both personally and professionally. Connect with Jonathan Riley at My Practice Counselling and start your journey to clarity, resilience, and growth. Book your session today at https://mypracticecounselling.com.au/ and lead with confidence by prioritising your well-being.